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(Accept mission)

Springs: Deadlift, that guy I asked you to kill, just ordered a bunch of inspirational posters.

Deadlift: I HAVE MOTIVATIONAL ISSUES!

Springs: Head to his ship and put them up everywhere. Here, take the posters and the delivery confirmation.


(Taking posters and delivery confirmation)

Springs: I need you to get that delivery confirmation signed before you put the posters up.


(Approach Scav)

Springs: Find somebody to sign for the posters. After all, I like to think I run a reputable organization.

Scav (if approached before Deadlift's been killed): The hell are you doin' on Deadlift's turf, Vaulter?!

Scav (if approached after Deadlift's been killed): Deadlift may have kicked it, but get off our turf!

  • Athena (if present): Need you to sign for a package.
  • Wilhelm (if present): Got a package. Sign for it or I'll kill you.
  • Nisha (if present): Delivery. Need your signature.
  • Claptrap (if present): Hello, scavenger! I have a package for you! Would you mind signing for it?
  • Jack2 (if present): Got a package for you, uh -- you wanna sign it?
  • Aurelia (if present): Sign for this, so I can go take a shower and wash off the sensation of having performed actual work.

Scav: I would be delighted!


(After giving clipboard)

Springs: Great! Now give him the package.


(After giving package)

Scav: Thanks! Now GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!

Springs: He's got the package? Cool. Now kill him. Guy's an asshole.

Scav: What is this? What secrets do you hold, hmm? What lies within your bowels, oh mysterious package? Be you a small kitten? Or a knife? Or a small kitten holding a knife? Speak to me, knife kitten! Show me the secrets of the universe!


(After killing Scav)

Springs: Awesome. Now you just have to put the posters up all around the ship. Deadlift's men will try to kill you the entire time, but... eh.


(Putting up first poster)

  • Athena (if present): I question the strategy of posting images of myself in the lair of my enemies.
  • Wilhelm (if present): No.
  • Nisha (if present): That would only look cooler if I was standing on a dead bandit. Or kitten.
  • Claptrap (if present): Such majesty!
  • Jack2 (if present): This is the picture of a woman who would smile while she shot me in the scrote.
  • Aurelia (if present): Is that cool? That's what "cool" is?

Springs: That's one poster up. Keep going. My customers are gonna get what they paid for even if you shoot 'em in the sternums while they get it.


(Putting up second poster)

  • Athena (if present): Hm. That does look intimidating.
  • Wilhelm (if present): Eh.
  • Nisha (if present): Agh, I shoulda gotten some blood on me before the picture. Damn.
  • Claptrap (if present): I look like someone so cool, he might even have FRIENDS!
  • Jack2 (if present): This makes me wanna stab someone!
  • Aurelia (if present): There's absolutely NOTHING about that I like.

Springs: Only a few posters left. Don't die.


(Putting up third poster)

  • Athena (if present): That picture's... not bad at all.
  • Wilhelm (if present): Hm.
  • Nisha (if present): That scary enough? I think it should have been scarier.
  • Claptrap (if present): Oh, no! My ego is growing! I'm developing... self-confidence!
  • Jack2 (if present): That's a little more information than I needed.
  • Aurelia (if present): That is a picture.

Springs: Just two more and you're done! I'm incredibly happy that you're doing this for me. If that's not clear, it's only because I've spent several months isolated getting almost-killed by kraggons.


(Putting up fourth poster)

  • Athena (if present): I have to admit, I look pretty cool!
  • Wilhelm (if present): Yeah, alright.
  • Nisha (if present): Still not quite intimidating enough... must be my clothes. Not dark enough.
  • Claptrap (if present): I look... GOOD! I have self-worth! I-- ERROR. UNIT HAS BECOME SELF AWARE, ERASE PRECEDING MEMORY CHUNK. Where am I? I feel sad for some reason. Hooray!
  • Jack2 (if present): Huh.
  • Aurelia (if present): I see.

Springs: Just put up one last poster and you're all done.


(Putting up last poster)

  • Athena (if present): Awwwwww.
  • Wilhelm (if present): Well now I'm hungry.
  • Nisha (if present): Ughh. Wanna snap its neck.
  • Claptrap (if present): Why thank you, inspirational cat poster! You're not so bad yourself!
  • Jack2 (if present): Ohhh, kitty! I ruv him!
  • Aurelia (if present): A kitten! Reminds me, I need to buy another hundred for my space-castle. Apparently, you have to "feed" them?

Springs: I overexposed the last set of pictures so I used a cat photo instead. People like cats. Anyway, come on back.


(Turn in)

Springs: I had a cat. It died.

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