Shoot This Guy in the Face/Transcript

Face McShhoty: IN THE FACE! NOT SO COMPLEX! NEED IT! WANT IT NEED IT HAVE TO HAVE IT! FACESHOT! BOOM! BRAINS EVERYWHERE! Not the KNEE, not the ARM, not the SPINE -- FACE! IT HAS TO HAPPEN! HNNNNG! FACEY FACEY FACE FACE! TIRED OF WAITING! NO MORE WAITING! NEED A FACE SHOT! BOOM! SQUISH! YAY!

(After accepting the mission ...)

Face McShhoty: SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! IN THE FAAAAAAAACE! DO IT! SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! FACEFACEFACEFACEFACE! NOW! BULLETS IN THE FACE! WANT 'EM! NEED 'EM! GIMMEGIMMEGIMME! AT THE SOUND OF THE BELL IT WILL BE: FACESHOOTING O' CLOCK! BONGGGGG! KNOCK, KNOCK! WHO'S THERE?! SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! END OF JOKE! I'M GONNA SING A SONG! SHOOT ME AT THE END OF IT! DA-DA-DA-DA, DA-DA! BONG! I NOTICE YOU HAVEN'T SHOT ME IN THE FACE! CURIOUS AS TO WHY! Maybe you're weighing the moral pros and cons but let me assure you that OH MY GOD SHOOT ME IN THE GODDAMNED FACE! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!

(If hit anywhere else but his face, Face McShhoty says any of the lines below.)

I SAID IN THE FACE!

WASN'T MY FACE!

WAS I NOT BEING CLEAR?! FACE!

BULLETS! FACE! NOT ASKING MUCH!

DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT A FACE IS?!

MY FACE! THE THING SHOUTING AT YOU! SHOOT IT!

I MAY BE CRAZY BUT AT LEAST I KNOW WHAT A GODDAMN FACE IS! SHOOT ME IN IT!

(When shot in the face and killed ...)

Face McShhoty: "THANK YOU!