Get to Know Jack/Transcript

(Vault Hunter accepts the mission.)

Mordecai: Never hurts to know more about the man you're killing. While you're in the Nexus, grab whatever files you can on Jack.

(Mission objectives update: Find first Jack ECHO, Find second Jack ECHO, Find third Jack ECHO, Find fourth Jack ECHO, Find fifth Jack ECHO)

(Vault Hunter goes out and recovers ECHO recorders.)

ECHO #1

Young Angel: I don't understand, daddy.

Handsome Jack: Say hello to your new home, darling. You're like a little princess, and this is your throne!

Young Angel: I want mommy. Where's mommy?

Handsome Jack: She's not coming back, Angel. Now get in the freaking chair!

Young Angel: I don't want to!

Handsome Jack: Get -- there we go -- in the chair!

ECHO #2

Handsome Jack: Okay, any candidates today, Angel?

Angel: There are... four treasure hunters who arrived on a shuttle several hours ago. They are currently on a bus to Fyrestone.

Handsome Jack: Great! Say this to 'em: ''Don't be alarmed. I need you to stay calm and don't let on that anyone is talking to you. Start making your way off the bus.''

Angel: The bus is still moving, sir.

Handsome Jack: Shut up. Tell them--

(Something like a muffled gunshot is heard in the background ...)

Hyperion President: John? Why have you dispatched one of our satellites to Pandora? What are you doing?

Handsome Jack: Uh... sir, uh, the energy readings my, uh... instruments, uh, at home are getting from Pandora are--

Hyperion President: Get out of there at once, you hideous little code monkey! And shut off that satellite!

Handsome Jack: Yes, sir. I'm sorry, Mister Tassiter, it won't happen again, sir.

ECHO #3

Moorin: Uhm, sir? we've lost at least a dozen staff to the Angel's malfunctions. We need to shut her down! Your wife suggested as much before her disappear--

Handsome Jack: Rrngh -- Jimmy, please make a note: I'm strangling Mister Moorin for bringing up my wife.

Mister Blake: Choked... Mister Moorin...

Handsome Jack: No, no, Jimmy, choking is something you do when you eat too fast. As I'm crushing Mister Moorin's windpipe with my watch chain, what I'm doing is actually referred to as strangling.

Moorin: Ghkk... please, please...

Handsome Jack: Tut-tut-tut-tut-tut... Shhhhh. There we go. Anything else on today's agenda, Jimmy?

Mister Blake: It's Jeffrey, sir. And no.

(Sound of a windpipe being crushed is heard ...)

Handsome Jack: Thanks Jimmy -- rnrgh! Well, then.

Handsome Jack: Drinks are on Handsome Jack!

ECHO #4

Handsome Jack: Why isn't this working, Angel?

Angel: I don't...

Handsome Jack: I've pumped every frickin' ounce of Eridium I've got into you but the stupid Key isn't working! WHY?!

Angel: I'm sorry, I don't know.

Handsome Jack: You're a SIREN! You're one-of-a-kind -- now make it work! I want that freaking Warrior, Angel. I want him awake, okay? I want him under my control, now -- I want him now! NOT LATER! NOW!

ECHO #5

Handsome Jack: Ah, tut-tut -- now now, Mister Tassiter, blackmail is such a dirty little word, isn't it? Actually, you know what, come to think of it, it's not a dirty word at all. It's kind of awesome. Blackmail! Say it with me: black...

Hyperion President: Oh, go to hell, John. Just because you got lucky with your Pandora hunch doesn't mean--

Handsome Jack: Because I was right, is what you mean. And call me Jack, idiot.

Hyperion President: You may have been able to scare the other directors into giving up their shares, but I know you. I know that beneath that ridiculous mask, you're still a hideous, pathetic little nobody.

Handsome Jack: Mister Tassiter -- maybe you can settle up something for me -- do you know the difference between choking and strangulation?

Mordecai: I've heard what I need to hear. Come on back.

(Mission objectives update: TURN IN!)

(Vault Hunter turns in the mission.)

Mordecai: If I didn't want Jack dead before, I sure as hell do now.