User blog:Itripped/Doing Laundry in Crimson Fastness

Crimson Fastness. Whoever came up with that name probably was half retarded. If I had to guess, my theory is they got all of these stupid lancers together and held a naming convention for the garage. The winner probably got shot for his efforts, but the name somehow stuck.

Has anybody else noticed that they welded the doors shut on all these trucks? Honestly, some days I really wonder who is in charge - oh yeah, it's Commandant Steele. Who taught her how to speak English, anyway? Women somehow managing to still cause me grief.

Speaking of needy women, I found Tannis hiding in a cell while removing helmets from these lance engineers. There was no 'oh thank you for saving me, Mr. Mordecai.' Instead, it was all 'go do this, get that, oh and hurry'. I left her in the cell - seemed like the best place for her. Really surprised she didn't ask me to do her laundry too.

So hey - not all of this was negative. No sir! Somehow I did manage to sell my current favorite sniper rifle though, and that has me bummed out a bit. But I found an alien gun that has a good rate of fire. I like it, doesn't need bullets, I'll keep it for a while, at least for backup. Found it in one of the red chests in fastness. Also seem to be finding these stupid big rocket launchers. That's okay I guess, but really, I'm a simple man. I'm ready for that 500+ dmg sniper rifle that can shoot at a rate of least once a second. Is this too much to ask for? Really?

Patience is not a virtue of mine. Not now, not ever. I stormed out of Fastness without so much a thought of 'farming is a peaceful existence for the lazy'. I get to the enclave and what do I see? More SPACE BUGS. However, those crimson idiots were busy fighting them. If this continues I can see the need to pack a lunch. I can let these jerks fight each other and then just pick off the stragglers.

Maybe not. That requires patience.

Even though my current gun has a ROF of 0.5 (pathetic, really) I figured I could start thinning the crowd. Between that and the Eridian gun I got, i was able to conserve sniper ammo and clear a path to start some of the chores Tannis asked me to do. I'm already crafting an invoice for her for this.

Back to these space bugs, or Guardians - the untold story here is that their guts really stink bad. I mean, i haven't smelled anything this horrible since riding on a bus with Brick after feeding him those burritos. Nasty. The best plan is to engage from a distance to keep the bug stink off you but that does mean the gear they drop is still smelly. So back to the laundry list for Tannis - I got two of the stations enabled - they have these stupid turrets again but they were cleared out with this eridian gun. I'll have to try to finish up the job tomorrow maybe. Maybe. It wouldn't hurt Tannis to sit in that cell a while longer to think about things, in my opinion.