The Don (mission)/Transcript

(Accept mission)

The Don: G'day! So, I was mucking about, just playing a bit of snick-it, this game that makes no sense that's all the rage round here -- and I hit my ball over there! Don't suppose you feel like fielding it for me, do you? I'd go, only I think it's against the rules. I'm supposed to run up and down on the spot shouting "Owzat!" or something. I'll send the rough coordinates to your ECHO. It's somewhere around there. I'm gonna leave you to it while I try and keep track of the score. And believe me -- between the two of us, you got it easy!

(On the way)

The Don: That's it! You're going great guns! We're 2 for 184 against, in the fortieth over of a bowl! No idea what it means, but just keep doing what you're doing!

(Attacked)

The Don: Here they come, mate! They got a hell of an attack! They got quicks with a lot of puff!

(Approach ball)

The Don: That's good, mate! We're 4 for 402 in our second innings and they just let a boundary through Silly Long Off! We carry on at this run rate and we'll put them back in so we can try and get 'em out!

(Picked up ball)

The Don: That's it! The red thing! That's the snick-it ball! Now get it back to me as quick as you can so we can try and win this one! We need 22 off 7.3 with only 2 snick-its left! We've got a chance because they just bowled a ball that wasn't a bowl and there's no fielders in the circle. Problem is, the foot-holes are really helping the left-arm finger spinners out of the rough. This one's really gonna go down to the wire! It's not going to be over until the last over -- and probably the last bowl of it, too!

(Return ball and turn in)

The Don: Aw, mate you did great! I finally got my century, whatever that is! And we either won or lost or drew. Or tied. Plus we got three snick-it maidens back in the pavilion! Awww, mate, I bloody love this game! Just needs a few rule changes so it makes completely and utterly no sense at all and it'll be ruddy perfect! As a token of my esteem, I'd like to award you with membership of my snick-it club!