Claptocurrency /Transcript

Accepting the mission
Claptrap: "Hey, minion! Whaddaya say we get friggin' rich?!"

Mission
Claptrap: "I had a great idea! Since Hector started a war, I'm thinking we try our hand at a bit of war profiteering! First, I need you to take these very special chain-blocks to the Dahl mine!" Claptrap: "Hector and his people are totally screwing up the Pandoran economy! So let's remake that economy in my image! The chain of blocks is the basis of my new economic model. Just go with me on this!"


 * (Entering the Dahl mine)

Claptrap: "Okay! Now set up the chain of blocks right over there!" Claptrap: "Now it's time for the real stroke of genius: cryptocoin! Start mining me some of what I'm calling, BECHO Wafers!" Claptrap: "And while you're down there, watch out for those devious Spiderants! They're creating Dark Webs! If you're not careful, theyyy'll get'cha!"


 * (Mining the first batch of BECHO wafers)

Claptrap: "Yes! Make me rich, minion! And I definitely won't be cutting you out of the deal at the first opportunity. You've gone quite mad if you think that!"


 * (Mining the second batch of BECHO wafers)

Claptrap: "It's working! The value of BECHO Wafers which I'm totally making up is completely off the charts! The charts are also made up. WE'RE RICH! WE'RE FILTHY, FREAKING, RICH!"


 * (Destroyong the Dark Web)

Claptrap: "Take that, Spiderants! There's no room for your dark webs in my BECHO Wafer mine!" Claptrap: "Good riddance to bad webs! Who knows what kind of dastardly deeds could be done on such a web!"


 * (Mining the third batch of BECHO wafers)

Claptrap: "Out of my way, peasants! New money coming through!" Claptrap: "YES! Bring me my riches, minion! Post-haste!"


 * (Deliver BECHO wafers)

Claptrap: "Hey, Lilith! I'm done carrying this team! Take your Crimson Raiders and shove it!" Lilith: "'Kay." Claptrap: "Sooo, bad news, minion. I have no idea how this happened, but... the value of BECHO Wafers has completely crashed. THEY'RE WORTH NOTHING! NOTHIIIING! I guess I'll have to go beg Lilith for my old job back."


 * (Watch this)

Claptrap: "Oh, Lilith! Mighty ruler of the Crimson Raiders! I beseech you to please, please let me have my old job back? I'm sorry I abandoned you in your time of need." Lilith: "Okay." Claptrap: "Thank you, thank you, thank you, your mercifulness! Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!" Lilith: "Sure." Claptrap: "As atonement for my hurtful actions, I now offer you... um, seven quintillion BECHO Wafers!" Lilith: "'Kay. Are we done here?" Claptrap: "No, thank you!"

End of mission
Claptrap: "Well, minion. We soared amongst the wealth gods themselves but alas, your insatiable greed took us too close to the sun."