Rakkaholics Anonymous/Transcript

(Upon approaching Moonshiner)

Hodunk Bootlegger: They're after the rakkahol! Don't let 'em shoot the booze crates!

Moxxi: Mordecai plans on sucking down more rakk-ale, huh? Did the same thing after he and I split up, poor kid. Bring me the booze instead and I'll give you my prize revolver, Rubi.

Mordecai: Woahwoahwoah - Moxxi's giving you RUBI if you give her my booze? The friggin' -- That bimbo lost Rubi years ago and I found it! She wouldn't even have it if it were'nt for me! No no no. Bring ME the booze, and I'll give you one of my old siper rifles.

Mordecai: Moxxi ever tell you who she dumped me for? Huh? Jack! I win the Underdome, I find Rubi, and bam - she drops me for the biggest fascist Pandora has ever seen!

Moxxi: Hey, until he set all those people on fire, Jack seemed like a pretty nice guy! It's not my fault Mordecai was more interested in pluckin' his bird's feather than plucking... my... dammit, I'm so angry I can't even come up with a sexy innuendo!

(Upon collecting all beer)

Mordecai: You got em all - now bring 'em to me and I'll give you my rifle.

Moxxi: No no - bring the booze to ME instead of that alcoholic bird-lover, and I'll give you Rubi.